Does this story want to be told in the first person?
In a story without beginning or end, an i that starts
in the middle is malformed, is incomplete, presents
no meaning. i is a burden that cannot tell its story.
Even this ordinary story. The uncapitalized i must say
things you cannot understand, things I dare not say.
And how can you be that perfect listener? You have to
know so much first. Things even I don’t know. So much
about wanting. So much about running away. You have
to know how far you can get when you want to, but
cannot run. You have to know which one needs more
want – running towards or simply running away. You
have to know that coming out of Rumi’s mausoleum
in Konya, i cried. Because to say everything there is
to say, you have to feel everything there is to feel,
and there is no way out of the labyrinth of not feeling
and not saying, both walking blindfolded through a
dark warren, looking for an exit that may not be there.
A story in many unequal parts, some missing 
~~~ “to say everything there is to say, you have to feel everything there is to feel” … this line made an amazing impact on me. I am going to ‘think’ about it for some time.
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So glad it resonated. I believe that lived experiences and life lessons reflect in one’s writing and make it more meaningful…
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Reading your lines make me feel that I am not running away but moving towards poetry. Beautiful Rajani.
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Sumana, so good to see you here. I miss your gentle poetic voice. Hope to start reading your poems again soon.
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Sometimes we have to trick ourselves into saying what we both long and fear to get said. I like your small i. The I (for any of us) has so much accrued to it, it can be hard for it to access the core or secret self.
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Absolutely… now to find that trick 🙂 I could have waited to start posting till I reached that point, but this is way more fun 🙂
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This is an incredible series, Rajani. Wow.
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Too kind, Sherry. Much, much appreciated. Thank you.
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Poetry is a gift that helps us get closer to making sense of the overwhelming feelings that are part of the human experience. This one does a magnificent job in exploring the limitation of words yet conveying so much emotion.
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Thanks so much, Rommy. It’s true a lot of things become clearer as they are channeled into sensible words, even just the metaphors we choose.
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